Coming to faith - The story of an Orthodox Jew

Brothers and sisters, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for the Israelites is that they may be saved.  For I can testify about them that they are zealous for God, but their zeal is not based on knowledge.  Since they did not know the righteousness of God and sought to establish their own, they did not submit to God’s righteousness.
Romans 10:1-3 (NIV)

Earlier this week, my wife and I were reading the testimony of an Orthodox Jew who came to faith.  Or to be more correct, my wife was translating a testimony for me while I stared blankly at the computer screen.  I have included an English Translation of the testimony below and the link to the original testimony is here:

מי אתה?

As I was reading this testimony, I felt this man gave a clear example of how Jewish people view Christianity.  Christianity is a serious threat to Rabbinic Judaism.  Yeshua spoke against the teachings of the Pharisees, which are the same teachings the Rabbis teach today.

The Rabbis teach Jews about the antiemetic Church.  They teach them all the things the church did in the name of Jesus, in the name of the cross.  They teach how the New Covenant scriptures are the poison that teaches Christians to hate Jews and forbid them from reading them.  If you have time, here is a great article from the Jerusalem Post about how the New Covenant Scriptures were sent to all the members of the Knesset:

Missionaries in the Knesset?

Recently, I have been sharing with you a lot of information about the history between Christians and Jews.  I am not sharing it to make Christians feel guilty, but so that you can understand what is being taught to religious Jews.  I am trying to help you see the Jewish roots in the scriptures, not to change how you live, but so that you can show Jewish people their Messiah in the scriptures written by their people.  Perspective makes all the difference in the world. 

Here is the testimony: 
 

Who are you?
(posted with permission from http://www.oneforisrael.org/)

My name is Yaron. I have been married for 11 years with 3 children. I was born into a religious family; "knitted skullcaps [kippot, yarmulkes or yamakas]", but religion did not fit me at a young age.  I remember myself as a child in primary school, muttering prayers without any conviction.  When I muttered them, too often I never really said them, but it was enough to convey the appropriate amount of devotion to please the teachers.

At that time I knew only the less beautiful portrayals of God and religion. I grew up learning more about the vengeful and punitive, and less about the "merciful God." There was a lot of hypocrisy around me which was very disturbing.  The term "appearance" (it is forbidden to do certain actions which in themselves are not sin, but appear as if they sin, while other actions that are sinful are allowed) was for me the embodiment of the established religious hypocrisy.  It bothered me that there was too much irrelevance in many of the mitzvot, such as: What is the connection between the prohibition of work on Saturday and electrical lighting?  You drag yourself up and down four flights of stairs instead of using the elevator.

Another issue that bothered me was the prayers in the synagogue. How are you going to talk with God and mean every word I say, if half of what I'm saying I do not understand, and the other half I'm not fast enough to complete because the Cantor is in such a hurry to go home.  I'm still on the "Shema" and he has already finished the "Eighteen [Blessings]."

I mustered the courage at age 17 or so, and I confessed to my father that I did not want to have his religious life.  I also left the yeshiva to go to a secular school. My father took it hard and wouldn't talk to me for a year and a half, from twelfth grade, until joining the Army and not much after that. My mom did not take it as hard as my father and she continued to speak with me.  The only thing my father would say to me was "the food is ready,” and other basic things, but he never talked to me.  It was a period of lawlessness for me.  I would go to a restaurant specifically to eat pork and other unclean food.

The turnaround happened at the end of the basic training.  After the induction ceremony, my father approached me and asked to make an agreement.  He said, in light of the situation, that he understands that I am an adult, so he gets my decision regarding the secular life. The agreement was simple: "As long as you are at home - you obey the custom of the house; you wear a skullcap on your head, you do not turn the light on during the Sabbath and you eat only kosher food at home.  Out of the house, you do what you want."  After this we became best friends and the agreement lasted until I was 25 years old, until my wedding.

Genesis 2:24 reads, "… so he left his father and mother, to cleave to his wife, and they become one flesh."  This made me the head of a family and as such I received the authority to act as an "adult."  But the truth is, in the last decade I felt this lack of faith and spirituality.  I looked for it in the arts and all sorts of Eastern religions – New Age.  I even returned to the religion of my father (for real this time) for a few months in late 2008.  I had a great feeling of safety under God and felt His warmth, but again those things from my childhood bothered me.  The Cantor in the synagogue again hurried through the prayers and I quickly looked around and wondered how all the other men thought they could "really talk to God” in their prayers.

It's like what is important to God is to "check off" this morning’s prayers, not whether you prayed from the depths of your soul or had a deep talk with God.  I'm sure I am aggravating an entire religious community who do pray with sincerity, but I can only speak from my own 30 years of experience.

I first learned about Jesus, almost against my will, during my undergraduate studies.  I am studying for a BA in history.  About six months ago I took a course on the "History of the Catholic Church in the Middle Ages."  By the way, this is a dark time period, in religious terms, for Orthodox Judaism.  But the point is, the first thing I had to do was read the New Testament, since you can’t learn about the Catholic Church without knowing the basic concepts of New Testament Christianity.  Lo and behold, my ignorance was lifted, I learned, to my great surprise, that the New Testament was written by the Jewish disciples, about a Jew named Jesus and the events that happened in the Jewish community in Israel.

I must here stop a moment and interrupt my train of thought, to admire the elaborate mechanism of self-preservation that has been instilled in us by the rabbinic tradition for over 2000 years.  Rabbis have no problem reading the Koran, but the New Testament is an abomination.  It is a book we should not touch, let alone read.  It is taboo in the religious community, and rightly so.  “Do not read the New Testament!  This book is dangerous!  You may find the knowledge (you may insert your religious faith here) doesn’t want you to know!”  Who knows, maybe the people will start to believe that the rabbis hid their obvious concerns from you, that the Messiah has already arrived, and no one bothered to tell you.

I realized that Jesus preached right up against all the things that had troubled me about religion from when I was a teenager.  “Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.  So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full.” Matthew 6:1-2

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full.” Matthew 6:16

I still hide my faith underground, leading a double life.  My wife does not know about my faith (although at any given moment there is at least one "new covenant" book in every room in the house, and a lot of Christian literature on the tables.)  I’m not going to bring up the conversation and tell her: "You see, I wanted to tell you that ...", I'm waiting for a question, for the door to open for me to tell her.  At least one of my brothers already knows, but it really does not interest him.  It would be difficult for my parents.

I have had lots and theological debates with my dad recently.  He even agrees with me that there are things that do not make sense (like not being able to use an elevator on Shabbat) but he said he was already used to living like that and he’s not going to change.  My grandmother also told me this, but they do not know that my opinion was not merely secular, but came from somewhere else – from something better.  The guys at work know and it does not bother them.

Jesus sacrificed himself for me, and for you.  He took my sins (which are many) and now, I am saved.  I believe as he taught us.  It's not easy.  Jesus sets before us a much higher standard than that set by the rabbis for themselves.  But this is a subject for another time.

What’s the Point?

For those of you who haven’t quite figured out what this blog is about, or where I’m going with it, I am going to take you for a little ride today.  I suggest you buckle up and find something to hold on to because I’m about to fly all over the place.

Matthew 7:22 – 23; “Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?’  Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you.  Away from me, you evildoers.’”

In these verses from Matthew, Yeshua is speaking about false prophets, and it comes right after the verses about knowing a tree by its fruit.  But something else struck me about these verses when I looked at them recently.  These people, that Yeshua calls evildoers, are standing before the Lord Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth.  I imagine Him, staring down at them with all-knowing eyes.  Eyes that make you completely transparent, that make you feel completely and utterly naked, and helpless before the most awesome power in the universe.  You know you can’t lie to these eyes, yet these people say, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name?  Drive out demons and perform many miracles, all in your name, Lord?’  I think the people he’s talking about believe they were doing these things for God.  You don’t lie to those all-knowing eyes when you feel them touching your very soul.  But He says, ‘I never knew you.’  And if He never knew them. They certainly didn’t know Him.

Now let me tell you why these verses struck me, and how God used these verses to speak to me, even if it’s not exactly in the context in which Yeshua originally spoke these words.

I was at a bible study and someone referred to these verses from Matthew, for reasons I don’t currently recall.  At the time, I had been going through a very dark period in my life.  It wasn’t a period of questioning God, or losing faith.  I was just depressed.  It felt like I was under a spiritual attack.  Most likely I still am under that same attack, but I am arming myself for battle.

Now, while I was in this dark period I was still doing God’s work.  Judith and I were here in Israel.  We were running the centers for Jacob’s Hope.  I was paying the bills for our compassion centers and lining up special outreach events.  I was working on the website and writing articles.  

So at this point you are probably asking, “okay, you were doing God’s work, you hadn’t lost faith, so you were a little depressed - we all go through that - what does that have to do with Matthew 7?”

Okay, since you asked, I’ll tell you.

As I said before, I believe those people were being honest with God when they said they were doing all of those works in His name.  And to be honest, when I read these verses my heart sank.  Wasn’t I doing God’s work, feeding the hungry and clothing the poor, all in His name, just like the people Yeshua calls evildoers in that verse.  I was doing God’s work, but did I KNOW God?  

Was I doing His work, because like David, I had a heart after the Lord, or was I just going through the motions?    I was doing the things I know are right, doing the things I know God called me to do, but I wasn’t spending the time I should have been reading His word, or spending time with Him in prayer, other than the occasional, “Lord, please give me.”  

Again, I understand this is a little out of context and that the Lord may not call me an evildoer when I come stand before His throne for my judgment, but while reading that verse I felt God saying to me, “You don’t know me.”

Although I may have taken this verse out of context, there is a story that may better illustrate my point.  In Luke 10:38-42 we read about Yeshua at the home of Martha and Mary:

As Yeshua and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him.  She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said.  But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made.  She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself?  Tell her to help me!”

“Martha, Matha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.  Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Like Martha, I was distracted.  I was worried about many things.  I was worried about our finances.  I was worried about the centers.  I was worried about all the legal issues involved with running a non-profit in Israel.  I was worried about learning Hebrew, about making friends.  I was worried about my marriage and about my children adjusting to life in Israel.  And I neglected the one thing that I needed. 

The enemy saw his opportunity, and he attacked.  I became depressed.

When I read those verses in Matthew 7, and I felt God stir in my heart.  It was a wake-up call.  I decided I don’t want to be like Martha, a diligent but misguided person.  I want to be like David (yes, it would have made more sense to say I wanted to be like Mary, but I’m a guy, and I have a point, so roll with me).  I want to have a heart like David’s heart, a heart like Yeshua’s heart.  I want to know the Lord I serve.  I profess to Love the Lord, my God, and don’t we want to spend time getting to know the people we love?

When I was in college, I found out I had ADD, Attention Deficit Disorder.  I bought a book recommended to me by a close friend who was involved with teaching.  It was called “Driven to Distraction,” and I remember as I was reading this book, I was like “Wow!  This is a book that totally explains me, who I am and why I do the things I do.”  Years later when my wife and I were making one of our moves, I came across the book and gave it to my wife.  I told her, if she wanted to understand me, to understand what life is like for me with ADD, then she should read this book.  Naturally, since my wife loves me, she read the book and I think it really helped her to understand me and improved our relationship.

We have a book that is all about God.  He gave us the Bible so that we could read about Him and get to know him.  If you love God, you have to read this book.  It’s amazing.  But just like my wife couldn’t completely understand me from reading a book about ADD, we can’t really get to know God just by reading his word.  We have to spend time with him.  We have to talk to him, in prayer, and we have to keep our hearts and our ears open to what he might have to say to us.

I recently saw a short video a missionary has put together about his relationship with three children from the village where he serves (I embedded the video, so you can actually skip the next couple of paragraphs summarizing the video and watch it yourself if you'd prefer).  The first child in the video, Fernando, is always coming up to him and telling him, “Give me some food.  Give me a shirt.  Give me some shoes.  Give me money.”  He said he feels bad for Fernando, because he knows that he doesn’t get all the food he needs each night, but he can’t help but be turned off by Fernando’s rudeness in always saying, “Give me!”

The second boy he showed in the video, Antonio, he said was a little older, and a little wiser.  He would come up to and thank him for being his friend.   But after a few pleasantries, he was more or less like Fernando, demanding a hand out.

The third boy he showed, Basilio, was younger than the first two, only five-years-old.  He said Basilio was his best friend.  No matter where he was in the village, he said this boy would find him.  He even showed on the video how he would walk down the street, and the boy would appear out of nowhere to be by his side.  Basilio didn’t want anything from the missionary.  He just enjoyed being with him and spending time with him.  When the missionary wasn’t off somewhere else, Basilio would sit and wait for him to come back.  You could see in this video the wonderful, loving relationship these two had.

At the end of the video, the missionary asks, “When it comes to you and God, who are you like?  Fernando? Antonio? Or Basilio?  When we pray to God, do we say God, give me this, and give me that?  Perhaps we dress it up in a few pleasantries like Antonio.  Or do we wait on the Lord?”  My summary really doesn't show the impact of this video.  You should really watch it!  No, I don't know this person, nor do I get anything from you watching it, other than knowing that I am blessing people by sharing it. 

While I was in my depression, I mostly prayed for me.  I didn’t spend time praying for others, or asking God for His will to be done.  The devil has many schemes, many ways to distract us, to turn our focus away from God.  Maybe we are like Martha, we are too busy worrying about the things of this world, distracted by our jobs and our busy lives, too busy to do the one thing that is needed: just to sit at the feet of our Lord and listen.  Maybe we have been hurt, and we are distracted by our own pain or our own fears.  We are too busy looking inward at ourselves to look up to God.

Ephesians 6:10-18 (NIV) says:

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.

Another thought occurred to me recently about knowing God, about knowing his one and only son Yeshua of Nazareth.  I have been blessed in getting to know a part of Yeshua that isn’t taught in most Churches, because most Pastors don’t fully comprehend.  When we study people from history, we try to understand them in their culture and the context of that culture.  Although we can learn about other cultures, we often don’t fully appreciate much of the differences unless we live in that culture.  We analyze what we know about Yeshua from the Bible, but too often people are limited in their understanding because their perception is tainted by a twenty-first century Western perspective.  Marrying a Jewish woman, celebrating the Jewish Holidays, living in the Land where Yeshua himself lived, has given me a new understanding and a new appreciation for who He was as a Jew on this earth and who God is as the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.

 This brings me back to my blog, in a round-about sort of way.  Since my last blog posting, I have been a little surprised by some of the reactions to my blog.  I have not had any negative reactions, but it seems to me that there is a desire for me to go deeper into subjects that I only plan to summarize, or to take it in a different direction than I plan on going (which is fine, if that is the way the Lord leads me).  It’s not that I am not interested in going deeper into these topics or going in those directions, but it’s not really what this blog and my book are about.  Of course, nobody really knows what exactly I am writing about since the only person I have discussed it with at any length is my wife.  Therefore, I have decided to give you all a brief overview so that you can decide if this blog is something you are actually interested in.

Who is my target audience? 

My target audience is Christians.  Mainly those who have heard about Messianic Judaism and want know more, or those who would just like to understand more about their own faith, and how the Jewish roots of Christianity affect our understanding of the Bible.  It is also for those who just want to better understand Judaism.  Those who want to find out about Jewish Holidays and if they still hold any meaning for Christians today. 

Many of my Messianic Jewish friends may be asking themselves now, “then why did you send your blog to me?”  I sent my blog to you because I respect your knowledge and your opinion.  You may already know all of the information I post about in my blog, but I want to know if anything I say is false, misleading or even offensive to you.  There has already been enough anti-Semitism in the church without me inadvertently adding fuel to the fire. 

What specific topics am I writing about in my book? 

Keep in mind, that I may or may not discuss these and other topics in my blog.  Nor is this to be taken as an outline of my book as some of these topics will be discussed in multiple chapters.  But I think the following list will give you an idea of what I am writing about.

1.        My story – Who I am and what makes me uniquely qualified to write my book

2.       The Jewish Roots of Christianity – Yeshua and early believers as Jews

3.       Mosaic Law, Torah and Oral Law – What’s the difference and how does that shape our understanding of New Covenant scriptures?

4.       Traditions – in Judaism and Christianity

5.       Jewish Holidays – What does the Bible say and how do we celebrate today

6.       Shabbat and Kosher Laws in the Bible and Early Christianity – burden or blessing

7.       Biblical and Modern Israel

8.       Understanding Christianity from a Jewish Perspective

9.       Proselytizing or Persecuting – A history of the Church and Judaism

As you saw in my last blog, one of the things I struggle with is how to deal with the rabbinic teachings.  Our view of rabbinic teaching will greatly affect how we view many of the topics I do plan to cover in my book, especially that one about the Law.  The Talmud is essential to understanding modern Judaism, and it also is very helpful in understanding a lot of what is written in both the Old Covenant and the New Covenant.  The Jewish leader Hillel, who is considered to be the founder of the teachings found in the Mishnah, died in the tenth year of the first century or 10 AD, about 20 years before Yeshua began His ministry.  So much of what is written in the Mishnah most likely reflects the various opinions of the Pharisees and Jewish leaders before and during Yeshua’s ministry and the time the New Covenant books were written.   

Yeshua himself refers to a teaching of Hillel in Matthew 22:39-40.  Hillel is attributed as saying, in reference to the phrase “love your neighbor as yourself,” in Leviticus 19:18, “That is the whole Torah; the rest is explanation; go and learn.”  Yeshua, of course, also adds Deuteronomy 6:5 (NIV) “Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength” (Matthew 22:39 reads “all your mind” in the NIV versus “all your strength” from Deuteronomy 6:5 in the NIV, but I digress) in saying “All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”  Although, it is often taught that Paul is quoting Yeshua in Galatians 5:14, as a Pharisee, Paul is more likely quoting Hillel, especially since he did not include the reference to Deuteronomy 6:5.  Some people may also point out Paul was not one of the twelve disciples and much of his knowledge of Yeshua came from his encounter on the road to Damascus and the teachings that the disciples shared with him.  He was not following Yeshua around to hear all his teachings so he may not have ever heard this story when he wrote his letter to the Galatians.  Paul likely wrote his letter to the Galatians around the same time Matthew wrote his Gospel (between 50-60 AD), so it is unlikely he had a chance to read Matthew’s Gospel (books took a while to circulate given the lack of a printing press).  Of course, he likely spent time with Matthew in Jerusalem, so there is no evidence he did not hear the story either.  Does this change any Christian doctrine?   No, but it certainly explains to me why Paul left out “Love the Lord your God” in his letter to Galatians.

Basically, what I am trying to say, without digressing too far down a tangent, is this blog will deal with both the topics in my book and those that run parallel to the ideas that run throughout the book.  I may jump around from topic to topic, especially around Holidays, as celebrating the holidays will likely get me thinking about the origins and traditions of the holiday.  But my book is being written to help Christians get to know their Jewish Messiah better than they already do.  We can better understand His teachings and His heart by understanding His culture and the context of His life.  Basically, I’m trying to give you a chance to better know and understand our Lord and Savior, perhaps in a small and insignificant way, but hopefully in a way that will be pleasing to our Father and will break downs barriers that have existed for thousands of years between Jews and Gentiles. 

A New Begining

A short while ago I began writing a book.  For years I have thought about writing a book on what it means to be “Messianic.” Of course, there are books already out there.  There’s Daniel Juster’s Jewish Roots[1], David Stern’s Messianic Jewish Manifesto[2] and Restoring the Jewishness of the Gospel[3], but all of these titles were written by Jews, about Messianic Jews.  As David Stern points out in his Messianic Jewish Manifesto, since I wasn’t born to a Jewish mother, nor have I ever converted to Judaism through the Jewish Rabbis, I’m not Jewish.  

So, what am I?  And what are the thousands of other non-Jewish believers who attend Messianic congregations throughout the world.  If we cannot call ourselves “Messianic Jews,” do we call ourselves “Messianic Believers,” even though our fellow congregants call themselves “Messianic Jews,” or are we still just simply Christians?  And even if we are only Christians, aren't our religious roots still in Judaism?  Why don't we still celebrate the Jewish holidays?  Why does Christianity look so different from Judaism? 

I started writing my ideas down in book form.  I wrote chapters on who I am, where the Rabbis came from, thoughts on keeping kosher, the Shabbat, the Jewish Holidays, traditions and how all of these things relate to one another.  You may be asking, "what happened to the book?"  Unfortunately, as I began writing, I got more thoughts and learned more information and had new insights into the subjects I was writing about.  I had to go back and rewrite entire chapters as I found information contradicting my original assumptions, or found a source that I had used to be inaccurate.  The information seemed to take on a life of it's own and became overwhelming.  

With this blog I am attempting to cut the information I've learned into small manageable chucks, which I will post each week.  It is my hope that as the weeks, months and even years pass, I will be able to reorganize all these chunks of information back in to book form, supported by reliable and accurate sources.  Until then, I'd love to hear your comments each week, your opinions and find out if what I have rings true to you or just sounds like a bunch of rubbish.  As we discuss each topic, I'd also love to hear what you have to say from your personal experiences, what you have found out in your own research and I'd love to know what sources of information you use to support your ideas.

Until next week, Shabbat Shalom and Shavuah Tov!

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[1]Daniel Juster, Jewish Roots (Pacific Palisades, California: Davar Publishing Co., 1986)

[2] David H. Stern, Messianic Jewish Manifesto (Baltimore, Jewish New Testament Pulications, 1988)

[3] David H. Stern, Restoring the Jewishness of the Gospel (Baltimore, Jewish New Testament Pulications, 1988)